I'm sitting on my parents' porch in Pleasantville (not the real name, but more accurate) with a cup of coffee and two dogs, watching the neighbors roll by in their fancypants golf carts. The perfect blond mothers are taking their perfect blond children somewhere. Perhaps to a play date. Phineas is not pleased, because he hates things that roll and make noise.

I'm at home because on Saturday my friend Katie married my other friend Nick. It was a really beautiful wedding, and it genuinely reflected the character and asthetic of the bride and groom. Or at least of the bride. I suppose I can't say for sure about the groom. But there was a candy buffet and lots of giggling during the ceremony and plenty of silly pictures. I was the HBIC (read as: Head Bitch in Charge) for the wedding, because that's the roll Katie asked me to play. I kind of enjoyed being a wedding coordinator. I don't think I'd want to do that kind of thing professionally, but I got the whole business off without a hitch. Most of that, mind you, was due to Katie's EXTREMELY detailed schedule and well thought out vision of how she wanted things to go. But my watch and I deserve some credit.

After the wedding I thought it best to change scenes entirely, so I went to a hiphop show. My friend Mike (MIKE PALM!) is the tour manager for 2Fresh, who are these adorable twins who play a really kickass show. So I went to that in my formal wear and felt totally out of place, but it was really fun. It was interesting to see how Mike and his friends live. On the one hand, they're professional musicians touring the country and making money, but on the other hand they're hanging out at house parties hosted by 18 year olds and trying to figure out what happens in the morning. It was like being in high school and being a post-college young adult at the same time.

Phineas just busted through the gate on the front porch in order to break out and attack a dog who was walking by. Why must he be such an asshole?

Anyway.

On Thursday night I worked Sundown but left early to start driving. Lots of people questioned my choice to start a road-trip at 3:30am, but I felt like it was the best idea ever. I haven't been as happy in a long time as I was when I got on the road. There's something really profoundly exhilirating to me about being on an open road with nothing but miles of interstate in front of you. I had a fast car, a loyal dog, loud music, and a giant cup of Mello Yello to keep me company, and I felt GOOD.

I had a fast car because I had to leave the Volvo at home. It's developed quite the oil leak, and the leak is worst while driving, which means the oil has spattered all over the undercarriage of the car. It's covering most of the bottom of the car and has essentially baked on there into a thick paste that's highly flamable. Basically, if I drive it at high speeds for a long amount of time, it could explode into a giant fiery ball of terror. Which, on the one hand, is AWESOME, but on the other hand is a little deadly, so I guess I'm going to have to fix that.

I'm sleepy. I had a really odd night last night, which I will not detail in an attempt to protect the vaguely innocent. But since it's my blog and not your blog I'll just say this: You are a very stupid man. And you should probably work on that. But regardless, I doubt I'll ever try you again.

I think I'll go hunt for the ingredients to make brownies for Cookie of the Week club.